After months of waiting for completion of an online order from a well-known furniture store and several changes to delivery date, Mrs Gos uttered the words that would bring joy to the heart of every man in the land:

"I'm never going to IKEA again"

Yippee! Hoorah! Calloo Callay!

No more being dragged around a store with it's ludicrous one way in, one way out system to view airfix furniture which you then have to go and collect in the warehouse before paying for it. Only to find it doesn't quite fit in the back of the car even with the seats down so you end up either damaging the upholstery or shove it in and you drive home with the corner of the pack stuck in the back of your neck feeling as if you are being held at gunpoint - although with some of the prices they charge for their laminated chipboard and dowel stick furniture, you may as well have been.

When you get home, there's hours of fun to be had trying to work out the pictogram puzzles on how to put it all together. The only difference between this and the airfix kits bought for your birthday by some well meaning relative is that there is no glue that smells nice nor any decals that fall to bits when you try and stick them on the tailplane.

The hotdogs at IKEA in Nottingham are nice though.